Posted by
Dennis Pemberton on Friday, October 16, 2009 10:33:22 PM
Morning. On a veranda. Bill is wearing Toy Story jammies. Hillary struggles into scene wearing bathrobe and disgusted expression.
Bill: Wha'd I do now, Hill?
Hill: For once, it's not you. It's those #@$%^&* Russians! And that cretin in the White House!
Bill: The one you lost to?
Hill: So help me, Bill, I'll strangle you with the belt of my bathrobe if you don't shut up!
Bill: Just tryin' (she starts untying her robe)... Okay, Hill (she ties it back)
Bill: (under breath) Thank god for that...
Hill: It's like he's running for President all over again... "You can't shake our hand unless you unclench your fist." What kind of #@$%^&* is that? Where's my bagel!
Bill: (starts spreading cream cheese on bagel) Comin' up d-
Hill: You hold your hand out to a Russian and they'll grab hold of it and kick you in the... (takes bagel) Oh, thanks.
Bill: Your W-
Hill: But that Chicago schmuck thinks it's working! "See how much they like me? Medvedev smiled at me." Like he's some skinny pimple faced wallflower going gah gah over the captain of the football team, not the leader of the most powerful nation in the world! And I make the twenty-hour trip to Moscow to get the payoff for disarming Eastern Europe, and I get bupkus! Worse than bupkus! They say they reserve the right to preemptive nuclear strikes! And Mr. Who's-That-Good-Lookin'-Guy-in-the-Mirror just smiles like it's all part of the plan! Plus I'm retaining water like the #@$%^&* Hoover Dam!
Bill: I was going to say... No, don't untie that bathrobe!